As The Poet Turns.....

Well as I mentioned a post or two down, I'm in this Project Verse competition. Damn, it's rough. This week, I don't really feel like I put my best work out there. Part of it was working long hours, being sick, burning my eye, and stressing over a big work event I had coming up, but a bigger part of it was angst, self-doubt, and second-guessing myself endlessly, until what I ended up with was...okay, but not really what I wanted. Not something that really expressed exactly what I was trying to say. I made it through, and I wasn't in the bottom two, so that's something, at least.

I can write certain things very quickly, but when it comes to poetry, I tend to be a plodder and a perfectionist. Sometimes, very, very, occasionally, lines will fall from the heavens and flow from my fingertips and my work needs minimal revision. But mostly, it's like trying to hammer metal into water. I can worry a line break to death, like I did in this poem, to so-so results. I can angst over a metaphor, obsess over one word, one single word, for weeks. And I do mean weeks. If I don't like how something sounds, I will think about that one line all day long...how do I get it to sound right? How will it fit? What do I do here? It's very hard for me to let something go, to consider it complete, unless I feel it's just right. Producing quality poetry quickly is a huge challenge for me. I tend to like endless swaths of time to polish, rework, and perfect. And then re-work again.

So, only two weeks in, I am already learning a hell of lot in this contest. I am hoping it will sharpen my instincts and my trust in myself. We'll see. Stay tuned for next's week saga...will I create two decent metaphors in 60 lines or less? Will I collapse with the pressure of it all and get amnesia and let the guy from the wrong side of the tracks knock me up in my dazed confusion? Only time will tell....